In 1994, I was coming into my teens and still watching weekend cartoons. I was a little old for waking up early for this stuff, but I loved them enough and was awake anyway, so I figured I might as well grab a bowl of cereal and see what was on TV. On a whim, I was channel surfing and hit upon TBS, which was broadcasting a show that blew my monkey mind. I had to keep checking the station identification as TBS wasn’t (and still isn’t) known for being that exciting or cutting edge.
The program I saw was a high-octane action show that had crazy sci-fi plots, aerial dog-fights, loads of destruction, military lingo, a thumpin’ metal soundtrack, and a beyond-brilliant voice cast of Jim Cummings, Charlie Adler, Barry Gordon, Tress MacNeille, Lori Alan, Frank Welker, Mark Hamill, and Gary Owens. Oh, and did I mention that all the characters on the show just happened to be anthropomorphic cats? Oh, well they were and it was AMAZING.
A Hanna-Barbera, production, SWAT Kats: The Radical Squadron (got to love that name) was the brainchild of Christian and Yvon Tremblay. Under the guise of being simple mechanics, two ex-Enforcers (this universe’s militaristic police force), Chance “T-Bone” Furlong and Jake “Razor” Clawson, become masked vigilantes and spent their time and energy fighting to prevent their home, Megakat City, from being conquered or blown to hell every episode. The duo faced off against a number of threats, such as mutants, dinosaurs, robots, and a particularly nefarious wizard named Dark Kat. Of course, this being the 1990s, they did this from their super cool fighter jet. It was big, colorful, bombastic, and ambitious; it was like somebody had brought a comic book to life. For twenty-three episodes (and one clip show) it rocked so hard your face started melting…
and then it got canned.
In this era of remakes of remakes and continuations of series’ from the 80’s and 90’s, where the hell are the SWAT Kats? The likes of the freakin’ Biker Mice From Mars and Action Man have each had two series at this point, is a little more T-Bone and Razor too much to ask?If we’re going to continually mine the past for material, we might as well pull from some sources that are actually innovative. It isn’t like the fan base has went away. Despite only occasionally being shown in reruns and appearing on a DVD release that makes cheap bootlegs look good, the show remains popular. Everything about this show is interesting, including the rumor that Ted Turner himself pulled the plug on the show because he thought it was too violent. Even sadder is the fact that there were six unaired episodes, lost to those who wanted just a little more of their beloved crime-fighting feline duo.
I have a short list of dream projects in my life, a list of things that if I only to manage to accomplish one, I could die happy. With every ounce of sincerity, let me tell you that a relaunch of SWAT Kats is one of them. There is just so much potential for great stories to be told. In a world of knock-offs and rehashes, it really was its own animal (pun intended). If you’ve never checked them out, I seriously suggest going and giving them a try.
As always, we want to hear from you. Do you love and remember the SWAT Kats? What cartoons or other programs from your childhood would you want to see again? Let us know in the comments below!
UPDATE 2/7/2014: Some of the people who have read this article on Reddit have mentioned that the members of the League of Shadows might also be aware of Bruce’s identity. First, this is an incredibly fair point and definitely something I overlooked. Still, please examine my counter-argument under the original post, where I explain why I think this isn’t necessarily a deal-breaker.
Second, thank you for coming to One of Us and reading this, I hope you stick around and check out the rest of our stuff!
Additionally, one person in the comments reminded me that there were two other people in Batman Forever who knew Bruce’s identity (Two-Face’s henchwomen, Sugar and Spice), which brings the count to 12.
Original post from 2/5/2014 follows:
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Ever since Ben Affleck was announced as the next Batman, many misguided fans of the World’s Greatest Detective have proclaimed that his will be the worst portrayal of the Dark Knight ever. I object to this, both because Ben Affleck is probably the best thing that could have happened to Batman vs. Superman and because it will be difficult for him to play the role worse than Val Kilmer, who is quantifiably and undeniably the worst Batman to ever disgrace the silver screen.
What’s that you say? That’s a pretty hefty claim to make? I know, and that’s why I will try my damnedest to demonstrate, with some evidence, why Val Kilmer’s Batman was the worst Batman of all time. Shall we begin?
What is the singular factor that makes Batman who he is? Perhaps you think that above all else, Batman should be a master martial artist. While I agree that Batman’s fighting ability is important, I don’t believe it’s the sole aspect that defines him. The DC Universe is full of excellent hand-to-hand combatants who match or even exceed Batman’s abilities (such as Lady Shiva, Black Canary, and Deathstroke) and none of them have the same impact (in-universe or on our culture) that Batman does. While Batman is also known for his talents as a detective, not even these skills are what can truly define the Dark Knight.
The correct answer is Batman’s ability to be a symbol of both fear to the criminal world and of vengeance to the oppressed. After all, that is how he got the idea to run around dressed as an overgrown flying rat in the first place. Recall if you will these famous panels:
These three panels right here are at the core of who Batman is, across all the incarnations we’ve ever seen. No matter who is playing him on screen, the character of Bruce Wayne must realize that he can’t stop crime as he is, only this symbol of fear and terrible retribution can. A Batman who can’t deter criminals from terrorizing the public is no Batman at all.
Now what’s the fastest way to strip Batman of his status as a symbol? Simple, reveal his secret identity. If you know who the vigilante is, it is an easy matter to retaliate against and/or arrest him. The wonder and mythical nature of this horrible creature, who is sometimes rumored to be a monster, would just fade away if the people of Gotham found out he was just some crazy dude with way too much money and time. The preservation of Batman’s identity is pivotal to his impact. Without it, there is no Dark Knight. The emperor has no clothes.
With this in mind, I propose that the operational definition of being a good Batman is as follows: the degree to which the individual can keep Batman separate from Bruce Wayne in the eyes of the people outside of the Bat-Family.
Using this operational definition, we can determine who the worst Batman is by going film by film and counting how many people find out that Bruce Wayne is Batman. Not only do we want to know how many people know who Batman is, but we also need to analyze who these people are and their likelihood of spilling the beans. I’ll skip Adam West and Kevin Conroy (the perfect Batman, in my humble opinion) so that we can focus simply on the films instead of analyzing hundreds of TV episodes.
For the sake of this argument, I’m only going to count the people who are alive by the end of film. If you find out who Batman is but you’re dead soon after, you can’t really have a negative impact on Batman’s reputation. Obviously, this means there will be spoilers from here on out, so if you’re sensitive about spoilers about movies from between 2 and 25 years ago, proceed with caution.
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Michael Keaton
Michael’s Keaton’s Batman didn’t tell too many people his secret, but he made bad choices about who he told. In 1989’s Batman, Vicki Vale was privy to this information, while Catwoman found out in Batman Returns. If you’re the infamous vigilante of your community, people you’ve dated/have been romantically involved with in the past are among the worst people you could let in on your secret nightlife. This is because every relationship ends until you’re in one that doesn’t, and more often than not, relationships end poorly. Batman’s relationship with Vicki Vale definitely came to an end. She doesn’t appear in the second movie and Bruce had already moved on to Selina Kyle by then anyway. His relationship with Catwoman ended with her appearing to sacrifice herself to save him, so she’s less likely to out him. However, she’s still a mentally unstable criminal at the end of the film. What’s to stop a bitter ex, especially one who is a journalist ever seeking the next big break or a deranged thief/murderer, from either exposing your identity or using it for nefarious purposes? Pretty bad, but not the worst.
George Clooney
Despite the fact that he is the Batman of what is universally cited as the worst Batman movie, George Clooney’s Bruce Wayne is somehow the best at keeping his identity a secret and preserving Batman’s symbolic nature.
I know, this revelation almost made me throw my findings out the window, but hear me out here.
When it comes to his true identity, Clooney’s Batman is incredibly tight-lipped about it. He doesn’t run his mouth to his romantic partners or unnecessarily out himself to his enemies. Barbara Gordon Wilson is the only person who figures out the Dark Knight’s identity and the likelihood of her revealing it to anyone is incredibly low. Not only is she sympathetic to his cause, she joins him as an accomplice, so she would be vulnerable to the same retribution, legal or otherwise, as Bruce and Dick. In terms of keeping the secret safe and making sure criminals and the public know to fear the Bat, Clooney’s Batman did a fine job.
Christian Bale
Several people found out Bruce Wayne’s identity in Christopher Nolan’s trilogy, but a good number of them were neutralized and the rest of them are allies. Bruce does tell Rachel Dawes and Lucius Fox in Batman Begins, but Rachel is killed in The Dark Knight and Lucius, like Alicia Silverstone’s Barbara, is culpable for Batman’s actions. Ra’s Al Ghul is aware of Bruce’s secret, but he’s dead before too long. A consultant for Wayne Enterprises also finds out who Batman is, but Lucius successfully threatens him into silence. In The Dark Knight Rises, Talia and Bane are in the know, but like Ra’s, they are both dead before the end of the movie. Bruce tells Selina and Jim Gordon himself, and Blake somehow divines the information out of nowhere. These three will certainly keep their mouths shut and even if they didn’t, Bruce is out of the game (or dead, if you’re one of THOSE people), so it’s basically irrelevant.
Which brings us to…
Val Kilmer
Val Kilmer’s Batman is the worst of the film portrayals because he is utterly incapable to keeping his identity a secret. A mere 37 minutes into the film, he screams out “Harvey! I’m Batman!” in order to prevent Two-Face from blowing up the circus he is attending. He didn’t even bother to lie or stall Two-Face, he blurted it out as loudly as he could in hopes that someone would hear. Only the chaotic scene that emerged after Two-Face announced his plan to blow up the big top kept Two-Face or any of his crew from finding out the truth. Personally, I find it hard to believe that not one person around him heard the proclamation, but I suppose it’s possible. Still, the fact that Kilmer’s character is so ready to give away his secret means calls into question the quality of his Batman.
Even if we let the circus incident slide, Batman’s identity is still known to at least 10 ADDITIONAL PEOPLE. Dick Grayson finds out, but he won’t say anything, so that’s all right. Bruce also informs Dr. Chase Meridian, the love interest of Batman Forever, which again is a terrible idea because if their romantic relationship sours, the secret is in danger of being revealed. Still, this is not why Val Kilmer Batman is the worst.
Late in the film, the Riddler uses his absurd mind-reading technology to find out that Bruce Wayne is Batman. Since he is colluding with Two-Face (who dies at the end of the movie), he shares this information with him and the two villains lead a raid into the Wayne mansion, where they kidnap Meridian and destroy most of Batman’s tools and vehicles. Obviously, “a raid” implies that there were others with them, so just how many criminals, aside from these two, now know that Bruce Wayne is Batman? The answer is here in this picture of Two-Face and Riddler’s gang chasing Bruce and Chase.
That’s right, eight criminals, who have every reason to blab or exploit this important information, now know that Bruce and the Bat are one in the same.
So by the numbers, here’s a breakdown of how many living people know Batman’s identity in each movie. We’re not going to count Alfred because he’s a member of the Bat-Family and every movie starts with him knowing. Additionally, when a new member of the Bat-Family knows, we’ll count them once. Even if we generously discount every single person at the circus and assume the Riddler will never tell anyone in a moment of restored sanity, you can see that Kilmer is by far the worst numerically.
*not counting anyone at the circus who might have heard or the Riddler, since he is insane at the end of the film.
Not only is Kilmer the worst numerically, he is the worst in terms of the quality of the people who know. Christian Bale’s count is high too, but it consists mostly of allies. Kilmer’s is almost entirely made up of HARDENED CRIMINALS. Why WOULDN’T these guys tell every miscreant they know that they know that Batman’s secret identity and they took part in destroying his home? What’s to stop them from coming back with more guys or with lethal weapons? Maybe one or two or eight of them will wait until Bruce Wayne is in public and then shoot him in the face. These eight men could be key to Batman’s downfall, so you’d think that he would make sure to get rid of these guys or silence them in some way. Nope! We never see them again. For all we know, they got their money and scattered off to parts unknown. Kilmer’s Batman makes no attempt to find these guys and keep his secret safe, because as we have plainly seen, he simply doesn’t care all that much about operating covertly. This cavalier attitude is completely antithetical to the very core of what makes Batman who he is, which is why I submit to you that Val Kilmer’s Batman is the absolute worst.
So there you have it. Unless Ben Affleck’s Batman walks into a crowded shopping mall and yells out “I’M BATMAN!!!” for the world to hear, it will be pretty hard for his portrayal to be worse than Val Kilmer’s, so shut it and wait for the movie to come out in 2015.
Of course, any theory or research project has its vulnerabilities. Do you agree with my assessment or am I completely full of it? Let us know in the comments!
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As I originally stated at the start of this analysis, the number of people who know about Bruce’s identity is not the only determining factor we should consider. We must also examine the type of people who know and their likelihood to reveal it. I believe the League of Shadows’ strict adherence to hierarchy and the chain of command, which is instrumental to its success, prevented those who knew from saying anything that would expose Batman’s identity.
It is incredibly likely that Ra’s Al Ghul informed the people who joined him when he burned down Bruce’s house. Like Kilmer’s Batman, Bale’s makes no effort to find any of these people lived after the events of that evening, which isn’t terribly smart. However, I would suggest that at least until the end of The Dark Knight Rises, the League’s members are compelled not to say anything. Talia and Bane begin formulating their revenge plot after the death of Ra’s, so it is likely that League members were instructed not to disrupt it in any way, which would almost certainly include keeping Bruce Wayne’s identity a secret under penalty of death. As we all know, the League is not shy about killing enemies and traitors and they are pretty good at doing it, so that would explain how the secret was preserved through the years between Batman Begins and The Dark Knight Rises.
The perfect time to reveal the truth about Bruce and Batman would be during the League’s lockdown of Gotham/Bruce’s exile, but even then the secret is preserved. After that the League of Shadows loses its leaders and again we don’t know what happens to the rank and file. However, even if members did say anything after the invasion of Gotham, that’s not Bruce’s problem anymore. Regardless of whether you think he’s dead or alive, he’s not coming back to Gotham anytime soon. Bruce left Blake with all the tools he’d need to continue the legacy, so at this point, it is up to Blake to find a way to eliminate the threat posed by the League and preserve what the symbol of Batman means to the public. I’d love to get a movie where I can evaluate JGL’s Batman on the standard I developed, but that’s not going to happen, sadly.
All of this is to say that yes, Bale’s Batman may have a higher numerical count than Kilmer’s, but when we evaluate the types of people that know, Bale is in the stronger position. I’d much rather have disciplined members of an elite covert organization with a rock-solid hierarchy know about my secret identity than ten self-centered thugs who have no allegiance to anyone or anything, aside from the almighty dollar. I still hold that the people who know Kilmer’s secret are much more likely to reveal it than those who know Bale’s, which still makes Kilmer the worst Batman of all.
Editor’s Note: This article was written by my good friend and former podcast co-host, Mr. Matt Hudson. Matt is an audio engineer and musician who has an unhealthy obsession with numerous genres of music, from pop to Swedish death metal to bebop and everything in between (except country, oddly enough). If you enjoy this section and would like to see more music posts on the site, please let us know!
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(Full disclosure: I’m a bearded white guy from the South.)
I was having a conversation with a friend recently, and I asked if he had heard Kendrick Lamar’s latest album, Good Kid: M.A.A.D City, to which he replied, “No. Ew. I don’t listen to rap.” I asked my friend if he had ever given hip hop an honest try and he said he hadn’t. I was a little taken aback, but I’m not really sure why. I understand that hip hop music isn’t for everyone, and there are people who might have legitimate reasons for not liking it. People like and dislike the things they do and there’s little we can do to change that.
The only thing I ever ask is that no matter what you may like, you should at least give an artist or a genre an honest chance before you cast judgment. I’ve noticed that hip hop is a particularly common target of people’s vitriol, despite the fact that many people have only heard a limited (read: bad) selection of the available offerings. Though everyone’s tastes do differ, it seems a lot of people have preconceived ideas about what hip hop is and what it isn’t. If you’re the kind of person who has an diverse taste in music and you haven’t given hip hop a fair shot, then I think it’s about damn time you did. Kendrick Lamar’s Good Kid: M.A.A.D City is a good place to start.
Did you see the Kendrick Lamar/Imagine Dragons performance on the Grammys? If not, I’ve posted the video down below for you. Needless to say, Kendrick KILLED it. I’d even go as far as to say that Imagine Dragons killed it as Kendrick’s band (sorry to any Imagine Dragons fans, but I don’t ever want to hear “Radioactive” again as long as I live, unless it’s the performance with Mr. Lamar from the Grammys). Kendrick has two full albums and a few mixtapes, but his biggest splash has been the aforementioned Good Kid: M.A.A.D City which is the one I’m most intimately familiar.
So what makes Kendrick worth listening to, you ask? Well, there are a few reasons, and one of them is his technical rapping abilities. I’d dare say that Mr. Lamar can hang with the likes of guys like Eminem. For the uninitiated, Eminem, despite his personal flaws and vices, is considered one of the best when it comes to technical ability among modern day artists. In fact, when I first heard the third verse of the song “Backseat Freestyle,” I thought that Eminem was making a guest appearance. Turns out, it was just Kendrick switching up his flow and rhyme scheme. The man has an undeniably fluid flow, a trait that shouldn’t be as rare as it is among mainstream hip hop artists.
That brings me to my next point: Kendrick isn’t afraid to get weird and mix it up when it comes to style, flow and perspective. In the first verse of the song “Sing about Me, I’m Dying of Thirst,” he raps from the perspective of the brother of a friend who had just been killed. In the next verse, he raps from the perspective of a sister of a friend who was a prostitute (it gets a little convoluted at times, but that’s what makes it fun). One of my favorite examples is when he raps from the perspective of his own conscience in the second verse of the song “Swimming Pools (Drank).” In this particular verse the vocals are slowly panned from right to left to give the verse a dream-like effect. Honestly, there are so many interesting elements concerning the production quality of this album that I could discuss it for days, but that might be for a different post.
One of the main reasons why this album is so good is the narrative that is somewhat buried within the album. At the beginning and end of certain songs there are skits where the listener hears people talking about various things. These skits, combined with the subject matter of the songs, create a narrative about a kid growing up in Compton, and eventually rejecting a life of crime. I know some of you are rolling your eyes at the idea of skits in a hip hop album. It seems skits were popular a few years ago among rappers, but most of them were really lame and distracted from the album. Luckily, the skits on Good Kid: M.A.A.D City are interesting and thought-provoking. The narrative, though, is difficult to piece together because the “story” doesn’t begin until the middle of the album, and the beginning of the album drops the listener into the middle of the narrative. If you’re willing to take the time to piece it together, the narrative of this album is definitely one that will move you.
What’s more impressive is that even though all these songs fit together to tell a story, they can easily be extracted from the album individually for radio-friendly hip hop songs. Upon first listen, “Swimming Pools (Drank)” appears to be another rap song about drinking and partying, but after actually reading the lyrics and listening in context of the album, it becomes clear that the song is actually about peer pressure and alcoholism. It has to be difficult, as an artist, to write a song that your label can play on the radio but also fits into your vision of an album. Usually, it seems that hip hop artists have to pick between the two.
I could go on and on about this album, but for your sake, I’ll let you figure the rest out for yourself. Obviously, there are many great hip hop artists worth listening to (mainstream and underground alike), but I was so impressed with this album that I felt compelled to share. Like I said before, hip hop isn’t for everyone. Still, I would encourage you to give the genre a shot, even if you have before and didn’t care for it, because as long as artists like Kendrick Lamar are working, music will continue to evolve.
If you’re now interested in giving Kendrick Lamar’s Good Kid: M.A.A.D City a listen, please consider using the link below to purchase it. By clicking the image below, One of Us will receive a cut of anything you purchase from Amazon, even if it’s not the album! Thank you for the support!
George Clooney returns to the director’s chair and, of course, that means you’re going to get something a little off-beat. In this case, it’s the true story of a bunch of art appreciators who were sent behind the lines of WWII to rescue and protect important works of art from the Nazis. And you thought your job was hard.
Clooney himself stars with Matt Damon, Bill Murray, Jean Dujardin, Hugh Bonneville, John Goodman, and Bob Baliban, an impressive collection of talent to be sure. But will it be an “Arty Dozen” or a just-going-through-the-“Motions Eleven”? That’s what your team of Unusual Suspects is here for.
Going deep into enemy territory with little hope of survival is their mission. This crack team of expert reviewers, Chris, Ashley, Elliott, and Beau, must get in, watch the movie, and get out with the secret review plans. God rest their souls.
There are times when I believe that there are few dissimilarities between the heads of the major Hollywood film studios and The LEGO Movie‘s villainous President Business. As much as we all love movies, we would be fooling ourselves to believe that art and commerce share equal billing on the marquee.
The dogma of any successful business must include at least one commandment on branding. If your company offers a product or service similarly offered by another entity, the strategy becomes to develop a brand that customers will come to know and favor. Teams of advertising experts cast a series of psychological spells designed to create a favorable subconscious association between your company name/logo and positive affective experiences. And then wham, bam, thank you Pavlov…you’ve got yourself a recognizable brand.
Side note: anybody else really want a Big Mac right now?
To a certain degree, Hollywood has always paid attention to this tenet of consumerism. Popular books have provided the basis of screenplays throughout the course of cinema history. However, the regard for branding wasn’t universal even in this practice as many of these filmic adaptations found themselves bearing titles independent of those of their literary antecedents. More adhesive to this conceit is the early studio practice of signing performers to multi-picture exclusive contracts. They were banking on selling the actors themselves as brands that were inextricably tied to their own.
Cut to the 1980s, the height of American capitalism in many ways. Did anyone really believe that Freddy Krueger and Jason Voorhees were surpassing third, fourth, and fifth sequels because there was a wealth of narrative depth in their struggle to murder every last teenager on Earth? Forget dream-logic curses, desecrated graves, or undead hillbilly rage, the real reason for the perpetual resurrection of these two slasher titans was the audience’s unwavering loyalty to those franchise brands.
Then the video games that were invented in the late 70s/early 80s began to enjoy adaptation to the big screen. This practice is all the more telling of Hollywood’s blind brand obsession, as the vast majority of movies based on video games send us angrily storming up to the box office afterward to demand our tokens back. Let the slashers simmer for a few years, and then new studios further cash in on the various horror brand-chises with remakes. But where this trend reaches critical mass (in that it massively chafes critics), is when the studio system’s developmental Eye of Sauron turns to the toy box.
The true exemplar of creative bankruptcy in Hollywood is their adapting of ACTUAL brands, specifically those of major toy manufacturers, into film. Sure, there were other woeful benchmarks; sequels were still a major currency, sequels sprouted like weeds, and young adult fiction was seemingly placed on an automatic conveyor belt from bookstores to film development without so much as a single exec actually reading them. But about the time G.I. Joe was fully posed into the shape of a summer tentpole movie, it was clear that originality had been shelved.
At one point, we came remarkably close to a turning of the tide. Universal loaded a boatload of money into adapting a popular board game, but to their chagrin, the poorly ballasted Battleship promptly sunk. In its wake, it appeared to drag to a watery death a few other in-development projects that similarly owed their creative roots to the hallowed aisles of Toys ‘r Us. Suddenly Tonka Trucks took a backseat and no longer was any one bending over backwards for Stretch Armstrong. For a shimmering moment, it looked like the trend had died.
God bless the poor, naive optimists.
I remember the distinct sting as my forehead struck the keyboard upon reading the news that there was going to be an honest-to-goodness LEGO Movie. A movie…about LEGOs. The trend hadn’t died, in fact it had filtered down from action figures and board games to building toys devoid of its own characters or even rules to work into the story. Who in the brick-blocky hell would want to take on that assignment? Is there anyone who could even…
And then, half-way through the knee-jerk, a quick scroll down the page revealed two names that immediately set my fears at ease: Phil Lord, Chris Miller.
By this point, having also seen The LEGO Movie, it seems abundantly clear that impossible adaptations are these guys’ forte. Let’s review. They took what was essentially a picture book, and made one of the best animated films of the last decade in Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs. Then they were given a forgotten novelty of a late 80s teen crime drama and ripped our sides apart with the brilliant 21 Jump Street. These are two of the smartest and most talented creators in the industry, and The LEGO Movie is likely their best work to date (you can listen to our audio review for more details). These two are so adept in this regard, that they actually give cause for at least a moment’s pause when condemning Hollywood’s current obsession.
Lord and Miller are the sole byproduct of the brand recognition schema that justifies its existence. I’m not at all suggesting that Hollywood knew what it was doing when it took the first steps toward the artistic quagmire in which it currently finds itself, but if the work of Lord and Miller is the result, then I’m glad for every muddy misstep. I have a feeling that the uniformity of the projects they’ve accepted over the last few years is no accident. Sure, it could be a simple matter of their demonstrated authority in the area of unenviable property adaptation leading to subsequent projects in the same vein. However, perhaps instead the challenge itself is the spark necessary to light their creative fire.
It may seem a tired chestnut, but perhaps necessity really is the mother of their invention. The task of transforming a two-dimensional (creatively) property into a (literally) three-dimensional film, if it is to work, requires a substantial outside-the-box approach. Yet films with more standard bases, films the like of which we see over and over, are so entrenched in formula that the screenwriting process can become rote. By instantly having to attack a difficult roadblock right at the onset, Lord and Miller free themselves up to bend, break, or even change the rules. One such moment at the end of The LEGO Movie, wherein the origin of their established LEGO universe is revealed, is precisely the type of self-aware, highly-evolved imagination that is absent in films adapted from more conventional media.
It’s very much like the Lars Von Trier film The Five Obstructions. Hollywood is the Von Trier to Lord & Miller’s Jørgen Leth; constantly challenging them with apparently more and more impossible material to convert into a film, while they grow as artists in the process. That’s not to say that everyone operating under these constraints will inevitably figure out how to make effective use of them, but frankly, at this point, I want this otherwise uninspired studio trend to continue JUST to see what these two movie MacGyvers are able to next accomplish. Dunkin Donuts: The Movie. Go!
What’s entirely appropriate about Lord and Miller writing and directing The LEGO Movie is that product itself is microcosmic of their greatest strength as filmmakers. Much like a tabletop covered in an imposing sea of tiny building bricks, these guys can stare down any unideal subject for adaptation, step back from the table, and figure out exactly how all those pieces will fit together to construct something unique and wonderful. And like most true LEGO maniacs, these guys excel when the challenge is greatest; when there exists no set of instructions for step-by-step construction.
Not everything about the Hollywood obsession with brand recognition is awesome, but with luminaries like Phil Lord and Chris Miller continually creating innovative, intelligent, and thoroughly entertaining fare, maybe it’s not all bad either.
I mean we know Hollywood is creatively bankrupt, but come on! How could anyone possibly make a movie based on building bricks and create something anybody would want to go see?
Oh, what? It’s directed by who? Ok, we’re interested.
Indeed we all thought it was ill-advised, but what in fact would be the final verdict of the Unusual Suspects once we had seen all the pieces put together? Ashley, Elliott, Beau, and Brian evade the internet lawmen once more to discuss how the movie connected with each and every one of them.
Give it a listen, and feel free to share this review if you enjoy it.
I remember being so excited when Dad brought in the Sunday paper. We’d have to wait for him to pull out the relevant grown-up pages and sit and at least scan them before my little sister and I were allowed to fight like crazed wolverines over who got which section of the funny pages.
I still can’t believe I ever was that concerned about what Garfield was doing with his day.
Flash to (*cough*) many years later and I STILL want to go straight to the funnies. I mean, fuck Garfield, but the internet has turned out to be a wealth of indie comic creators writing with great nicheyness to appeal to every tiny demographic under the sun. Or, in our case, hiding from the sun, as it is evil and destroys happiness.
It burns…it burns…
(ahem)
But, I’ll leave the humor here to the actual cartoonists, like our good friend and former member of the LEOG, Jason Fisher, who turned in this beauty as hopefully the first of many of the like we’ll see from him:
And here’s where you come in…
We want more.. MORE….
Bring us all your homemade cartoon strips. Start one, if even you never dreamed you my try such a thing. You never know what hidden reserves you might have. Do you think the XKYCD guy thought to himself, “I’m so naturally gifted at drawing characters, I should do a regular strip”? Of course not. Be creative. Show us what you got.
Hell, even I’VE put together a comic before. Sure, I used an app to do it, but what the hell…
Funny is funny and even this type of thing counts.
However,
DO NOT
post them in the comments. Send them to us at oneofusnet@gmail.com and if we like what we see, we’ll be in touch. The dream is to see Oneofus have a regular Sunday funnies page. But it depends on you. Be part of The Us.
As we come closer to March, the feeling of anticipation for 2014’s South By Southwest Film Festival is growing tremendously. I can feel it all the way on the East Coast! The eagerness is well-deserved, as SXSW is one of the most amazing events in our nation’s culture. I only wish I could attend this year!
Last week, the features list for this year’s SXSW was revealed to the public. You can see that list here. Adding to this, we now have the list of this year’s midnighters, the films that are among the most provocative and unique features at the festival. You can catch all of these down below, so read them and get excited!
13 Sins
Director/Screenwriter: Daniel Stamm, Screenwriter: David Birke A cryptic phone call sets off a dangerous game of risks for Elliot, a down-on-his luck salesman. The game promises increasing rewards for completing 13 tasks, each more sinister than the last.
Cast: Mark Webber, Rutina Wesley, Devon Graye, Pruitt Taylor Vince, Richard Burgi, Tom Bower, Ron Perlman (World Premiere)
Among The Living (France)
Director/Screenwriter: Julien Maury, Alexandre Bustillo After horror favorites Inside and Livid, Maury and Bustillo pair up again for a horror-thriller at the cross roads between Stand by Me and Friday the 13th.
Cast: Anne Marivin, Béatrice Dalle, Francis Renaud, Fabien Jegoudez, Nicolas Giraud (World Premiere)
Exists
Director: Eduardo Sánchez, Screenwriter: Jamie Nash Five friends on a camping weekend in the remote woods of East Texas struggle to survive against a legendary beast that is stronger, smarter and more terrifying than they would have ever believed exists.
Cast: Chris Osborn, Dora Madison Burge, Roger Edwards, Denise Williamson, Samuel Davis (World Premiere)
The Guest
Director: Adam Wingard, Screenwriter: Simon Barrett A soldier on leave befriends the family of a fallen comrade, only to become a threat to all around him when it’s revealed he’s hiding dangerous secrets from his past.
Cast: Dan Stevens, Maika Monroe, Leland Orser, Lance Reddick, Sheila Kelley
Home
Director/Screenwriter: Nicholas McCarthy When a realtor is asked to sell a vacant home, she and her sister cross paths with its previous tenant: a teenage girl who sold her soul to the devil.
Cast: Naya Rivera, Catalina Sandino Moreno, Ashley Rickards, Wyatt Russell, Ava Acres (World Premiere)
Honeymoon
Director/Screenwriter: Leigh Janiak, Screenwriter: Phil Graziadei Young newlyweds find their honeymoon spiraling mysteriously into chaos.
Cast: Rose Leslie, Harry Treadaway, Ben Huber, Hanna Brown (World Premiere)
Late Phases
Director: Adrián García Bogliano, Screenwriter: Eric Stolze When deadly attacks from the forests beset a secluded retirement community, it is up to a grizzled veteran to figure what the residents are hiding.
Cast: Nick Damici, Ethan Embry, Erin Cummings, Tom Noonan, Lance Guest (World Premiere)
Oculus
Director/Screenwriter: Mike Flanagan, Screenwriter: Jeff Howard As children, two siblings witnessed their parents’ harrowing descent into madness and death. Now, as adults, they reunite to expose and destroy the supernatural entity responsible: the Lasser Glass – a legendary mirror their parents owned.
Cast: Karen Gillan, Brenton Thwaites, Rory Cochrane, James Lafferty, Katee Sackhoff (U.S. Premiere)
Stage Fright
Director: Jerome Sable Stage Fright tells the story of a snobby musical theater camp terrorized by a bloodthirsty masked killer who despises musical theatre. “Scream” meets “Glee” in this genre-bending R-rated horror-musical.
Cast: Allie MacDonald, Douglas Smith, Brandon Uranowitz, Kent Nolan, Melanie Leishman
(World Premiere)
Starry Eyes
Directors/Screenwriters: Dennis Widmyer, Kevin Kolsch In the city of dreams, a desperate actress will do whatever it takes for the role of a lifetime… no matter what the cost.
Cast: Alexandra Essoe, Amanda Fuller, Fabianne Therese, Noah Segan, Shane Coffey (World Premiere)
Will you be attending SXSW this year? Which of the midnighters are you interested in seeing? Let us know in the comment section!
A few days ago, a Super Bowl occurred that made extremely dubious the boasted distinction of “super.” Seriously, we witnessed a more evenly-matched contest during the finale of Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid. Luckily, the Inside the Locker crew gathered to record not a play-by-play commentary of the game, but rather a comprehensive breakdown of the commercials and trailers that come replete with every Super Bowl.
We were joined by the incorrigible C. Robert Cargill and our buddy, and film producer, Paul Gandersman for a live advertisement analysis that would have made the ESPN guys chew and devour every page of the piles of notes that their interns worked so hard to prepare for them.
How would we rate the film trailers for which we harbored the most anticipation? Would Age of Extinction accomplish the impossible task of actually getting us excited for a Transformers movie again? How many sinister villains would we count in The Amazing Spider-Man 2 spot? And would Doritos be able to topple Budweiser and/or the sight of Scarlett Johansson’s face for the coveted title of the greatest ad of the night?
Even if you couldn’t tune in on Sunday, you can still download the commentary and join in on the fun. Don’t worry that you can’t see the game or the commercials as you listen. After all, most of the ads are now on YouTube, and even if you didn’t watch the game, you still have more on-field vision than did The Denver Broncos.
Follow us on Twitter, otherwise you’ll make us cry more than this commercial did. *sniff* I got something in my eye *sniff*
In May, Jack Bauer will return to our screens in the ninth season of 24 entitled ‘Live Another Day. ‘ I am super excited for his return and here’s why.
When ’24’ Debuted back in 2001 it was remarkable TV viewing. It presented a 24 episode, real time structure depicting an entire days events. Real time itself had never been utilized in the mainstream and used in more experimental projects such as Mike Higgis’ ‘Timecode’ .
For me personally, ’24’ was also one of the first shows in my adult life I was attracted too. I had moved past the pain of losing Buffy, Angel and Friends and had began studying at University in 2008 when I began to watch it. Yes I was late to the party, but I never followed American TV, Nor had Fox to catch it before hand (apart from that one shot of Jack crying at the end season three featured in an old Fox trailer).
Can you tell I was addicted to it?
It was exciting, full of intrigue and featured some of the most iconic characters in the lexicon. I was immediately hooked. Yes, in the later seasons it got a little stale and predictable, but even at its weakest I believe that ’24’ was still a quality show with much to give. I was never fully satisfied with the conclusion of the eighth season and whilst the final moments were touching, it was never the finale we deserved and I always believed that it would return in some form.
There was talk for a number of years of ’24’ returning. At one point there was a rumor that Jack Bauer would team up with John McClane in a new series or feature. Many deemed it an awful decision but I was interested. It would have been fascinating to see these two characters come to blows. It could have also helped reinvigorate the ‘Die Hard’ franchise but alas, ‘A Good Day to Die Hard’ is what we ultimately got and we all know how that turned out.
The problem with ’24’ returning was simple. It was one of the last of a dying generation of television. TV evolved and began producing high quality shows such as ‘Breaking Bad’ ‘Walking Dead’ with shorter episode numbers and increased focus on character and story telling. How would a dying format of twenty plus episodes fit into today’s TV landscape. I guess the answer is that it couldn’t, but that hasn’t stopped ’24’ from returning. After failed movie attempts it was confirmed last year that the show would return in a twelve episode structure retaining real time, but allowing hourly jumps between episodes to suit the story. The real time format of the show by this point is ingrained in culture and therefore, I feel it’s easier for this decision to be made. A long break in production is hopefully exactly what the entire creative team needed to produce some high quality, high adrenaline TV.
I always enjoyed how, regardless of how much time had passed between seasons there was a sense of progression within the characters, specifically within the political sphere which inhabits much of ’24’. This new season sees former Secretary of Defense James Heller, featured in seasons four, five and six return, now as the President of the US after Alison Taylor no doubt stepped down after the events of season eight. It fits, it makes sense and gives a continuity to the world of the show.
With a increasingly interesting cast, including Stephen Fry and a relocation to London I hope this new season can be fresh, interesting and personal for Jack Bauer. After the Superbowl trailers which featured some rather awful CG, I hope we won’t see a return of the poor CG that plagued the later seasons and rather the down to earth effects such as we (for the most part) see in the extended trailer.
’24’ remains one of my favorite shows of all time and I cant wait for its return… DAMMIT CHLOE!
What was you favorite season or moment from ’24’? Are you looking forward to the new season? comment below.
