Horrible Comedy Sequels Not 2 Watch

In honor of this year’s Dumb and Dumber To and Horrible Bosses 2, we here at OneOfUs.net have provided a list of terrible comedy sequels that you shouldn’t waste a second of your precious time watching. OneOfUs.net’s own Christopher J. Herman and Thomas Mariani present a selection of the worst of the absolute worst comedy sequels to date. Who knows? A few comedies from this year might make next year’s list!

 

10. Ghostbusters II

gbII
“Now hear me out Egon; what if we were all women?”

Now, this is a divisive example. Admittingly, for all it’s faults, the second Ghostbusters film isn’t the most egregiously awful example of a comedy sequel, especially when you consider any of the other films on this list. At the very least, it still has the chemistry between Bill Murray, Dan Aykroyd, Harold Ramis and Ernie Hudson shine through at certain moments. Yet, the majority of this follow up to the much beloved original has the same crucial issue that hurts all comedy sequel (as you’ll see below); constant repetition to the point of being a remake of the first rather than a true sequel. From the Ghostbusters forced into the roles of underdogs to the giant being walking the streets of New York during the climax, the same beats are all clearly there from the original, which just makes it more of a way to show off the ghost effects rather than a fun new adventure with the beloved gang.

This also results in Sigourney Weaver taking even more of a backseat than when she was transformed into a dog demon and Rick Moranis attempts juggling scenes with Slimer being cute to appeal to the kids who watched The Real Ghostbusters at home and a romantic fling with Annie Potts that feels rather sudden given her relationship with Ramis in the last film. It all ends up being a disappointment, especially given the unfortunate fact that we won’t get the original crew together in another film. Ah well, at least it’s got Bill Murray yelling at a toaster. That counts for something.

9. An American Werewolf in Paris

PWA
Makes Benicio Del Toro look passable by comparison.

While most tend to remember the original An American Werewolf in London for it’s horrific werewolf transformations, there’s also a lot of laughs to be had. Writer/director John Landis managed to balance out the gore with genuinely funny character based humor, which helps to endear you to the characters before they’re mauled to death. Unfortunately, neither the humor nor the werewolf transformations manage to work in this mostly in-name-only 1997 follow up, which is filled with cartoon physics, annoyingly bro-like characters and one confused looking Julie Delphy who’s desperately seeking another Richard Linklater/Ethan Hawke movie to shoot.

The whole thing feels like a person read the original outline of London before writing this as the bare minimum of research, with a few half assed returning elements like the ghosts haunting our lead or a shadowy secret around the lore of the werewolf, but they all feel forced and unfitting for a film that constantly breaks the rules of the original. It doesn’t help that Rick Baker’s Academy Award winning practical effects are replaced by late 90s CGI werewolves that look horrendous by any standard, but not even in a funny way.

8. Austin Powers in Goldmember

agot-2
Mike Myers, moments after seeing the box office take for The Love Guru.

Right after winning millions over with his vocal work in Shrek but just before he ended up ruining everyone’s childhoods with The Cat in the Hat, Mike Myers released the third and (as of this writing) final film in his trilogy of 60s spy spoofs. The film served as one of the last live action financial hits for Myers before his career was justly ruined by the gratingly unfunny romp that charmed no one The Love Guru, which many argued showed a lack of original evolution with Myers’ comedy. The same can honestly can be said for Goldmember, where Myers’ idea for a new inventive character for him to play that people will fall for is a Dutch weirdo with a gold penis and a proclivity for collecting samples of dead skin. Not quite as fun as an incompetent Dr. No with the voice of Lorne Michaels or a seriously outdated British spy, is it?

The biggest issue with Goldmember is that the over the top antics of Austin and his pals lack any real direction. There’s a basic plot about world domination and Austin trying to patch things up with his estranged father (played as one of the film’s brighter spots by Michael Caine on the cusp of his Christopher Nolan ushered comeback), but it all just feels like a window dressing for cameos, overlong gags and general pandering. True, the original film’s plot wasn’t very complex, but the chemistry between Myers and Elizabeth Hurley as well as Austin’s hope to find his place in the then modern era of the 90s had an endearing sensibility that made the gags funnier. Here, none of that chemistry is present with new love interest Beyonce Knowles and Austin’s issues with his father come off as a ham fisted excuse for the horrid reveal that Dr. Evil and Austin are brothers rather than a genuine dynamic. It all ends up being about as self indulgent as anyone who attempted to do a bad Austin Powers impression post-International Man of Mystery.

7. Beverly Hills Cop III

bhc3
Trivia: Eddie Murphy gives these to people who feel justifiably ripped off by his films.

At a certain point, someone needs to give Eddie Murphy an award for Most Consistently Disappointing Sequel Machine. Another 48 Hours, The Nutty Professor II: The Klumps  and most of the others have taken the goodwill of his earlier work and flushed it down the toilet… which is an apt metaphor for his career in general. Many would cite Beverly Hills Cop III as the first true sign of a sharp decline for both Murphy and director John Landis, who destroy the charms that made them so endearing as artists. For Murphy, it’s the seemingly glazed over boredom that completely hides the once lovable and vibrant personality in this film. Instead of being the wisecracking Axel Foley that made helped make Eddie Murphy the mega-star he was in the 80s, he’s this bland every cop who just gets things done with the occasional unfunny sight gag or yawn worthy one liner that makes this feel more like a Beverly Hills Cop rip-off rather than a follow up. Similarly, Landis’ usual pension for Hollywood in-jokes and cameos seem to get more attention than any of the jokes that actually matter to the story or characters. Both Landis and Murphy have admitted that the film was a disappointment, but the latter’s continued attempts to make up for it with a fourth entry with Brett Ratner at the helm doesn’t inspire laughs so much as cries of terror.

6. The Hangover Part III

chowover3
Senor Chang has seen far funnier days.

Many like to give the second film in the Hangover franchise a lot of grief and I don’t blame them. It’s probably the textbook example of a bad comedy sequel, reusing old jokes,  giving little to no development of the characters and turning up the raunchiness just for the sake of being raunchy. But, for all it’s faults, the second Hangover at least still feels like an actually follow up to the first movie. With the third and (hopefully still final) entry in the series, director Todd Phillips decided to turn this R rated comedy franchise into a seedy, mean spirit and largely unfunny Tony Scott style action crime film. Now, that’s very clearly avoiding the issue of repetition, but it goes into a completely different problem of being in a totally different genre that the other films. It doesn’t help that talented folks like Bradley Cooper, Ed Helms, Jeffrey Tambor and John Goodman are sidelined in favor of the grating staleness of a whining Zach Galifanakis and an arrogantly screaming Ken Jeong, both managing to be far worse than they ever were in the original films. Oh, and did I mention there’s at least three different instances of animal death? What hilarity!

5. Caddyshack II

1842088,J8pewl_AL5lVjAz0EF78Zj+1+ep9VZmtno7d6guTTjRw+7oNmxMioOI6kztYzm9gPGnkVBCfYYeZ3H8jcyq0DA==
Chevy Chase clearly didn’t take this relaxation advice into mind when dealing with Dan Harmon.

Caddyshack is one of the greatest comedies ever made. Hell, it’s considered to be the best by a lot of people. Directed by Harold Ramis, Caddyshack starred Rodney Dangerfield, Bill Murray, Chevy Chase and Ted Knight. With the exception of Chase and a first draft of the script co-written by Ramis, Caddyshack II has almost none of the original creators or characters. One of the most remarkable things about Caddyshack II’s place in cinematic history is how so few people actually know it exists. That says a lot about how bad the movie actually is. Supposedly, Dangerfield refused to return for the sequel even after being offered $7 million to reprise his role.  Also, Murray sued the producers of the film for their use of the iconic stuffed gopher, for which Murray is credited with co-creating. Well, I’m sure none of that spelled disaster early on, right?

Taking place sometime after the events of the first film, the Bushwood Club is still a place where the wealthiest of snobs rub shoulders with lowly caddies and other miscreants. Jackie Mason plays a Dangerfield-lite character that spends most of the time mimicking the legendary comedian. Unlike Dangerfield’s crass R-rated one-liners, Mason is censored due to the film’s PG rating. Chase makes a handful of appearances, but he’s barely in the movie and looks as if he doesn’t want to be there to begin with. Dan Aykroyd plays a version of Murray’s original gopher hunting groundskeeper from the first film (for which Aykroyd received a coveted Razzie Award for). All in all, Caddyshack II suffers not only because it doesn’t do anything different than the previous film, but that it does absolutely nothing well in the first place.

 

4. Short Circuit 2

421294
Johnny 5 is alive… but the joke is long dead.”

Yes, there was a sequel to Short Circuit, and yes, it’s even worse than the first film. For those that don’t know (you’re lucky if you don’t), Short Circuit was solely made to capitalize on the widespread success of Steven Spielberg’s E.T. Unlike the cute/grotesque looking alien that warmed audiences hearts, filmgoers were treated to an annoying metal monstrosity named Johnny Five who primarily spoke in film and television references that were supposedly popular at the time. In the sequel, Johnny Five some how winds up involved in a loan shark/bank robbing scheme. It makes little to no sense and the sheer awfulness only increases with Johnny Five’s dimwitted responses to what’s going on around him.

The most painful scenes involving Johnny Five being initiated into a Latino street gang called the Los Locos. Johnny quickly embraces the horribly offensive stereotypes and becomes even more annoying than anyone could possibly have ever imagined. He even memorizes the Los Locos mantra, “Las Locos Kick Your Ass, Los Locos Kick Your Face, Los Locos Kick Your Balls Into Outer Space!” What wonderful entertainment for children that was.

3. Blues Brother 2000

blues-brothers-2000_610
Pictured: Dan Aykroyd and a bunch of others no one wanted to see in those suits. Not Pictured: John Belushi spinning in his grave.

You know it’s a bad sign when a sequel to a beloved film is missing one of the main leads. It’s especially worse if that lead happens to have died nearly two decades prior. Still, that didn’t stop Director John Landis and Dan Aykroyd from making Blues Brothers 2000 without John Belushi. Ackroyd returns as Elwood Blues, who learns that after his 18 year stint in prison that his brother, Jake (Belushi), died while he was locked up. Why Elwood wasn’t told that his brother was dead while serving his prison sentence is completely unexplained. Worse, Elwood spends most of the film attempting to fill the iconic shoes that his little brother left behind. John Goodman (the Belushi replacement) does a decent job, but he plays second fiddle to Aykroyd who provides himself with most, if not all of the jokes and dialogue for the film (Aykroyd and Landis penned the script by the way).

The movie attempts to copy and paste the same scenarios from the original classic with little to no success. Instead of being pursued by an angry army of Neo-nazis, it’s an angry army of gun totting rednecks. Instead of an epic car chase through a mall, you get a scene where the Blues Mobile suddenly becomes a submarine. Yes, you have wrathful nuns, incompetent cops and dozens of guest appearances from well known musicians and singers, but the film feels overlong and bloated as it attempts to remake almost the exact same scenes from the original. There was no way Aykroyd, Goodman, Landis nor God could save this painfully unfunny sequel to one of the greatest comedies of the 1980s. Well, it could have been worse. Jim Belushi could have played the role of Jake.

2. Evan Almighty

evanalmighty
Someone should use this as Carell’s Oscar clip for Foxcatcher.

In Bruce Almighty, Jim Carrey was given the powers of God. In the sequel Evan Almighty, Steve Carell was given the power to get pooped on by birds. Oh, it gets much worse. Billed as being the most expensive comedy ever produced (it was replaced by Men in Black 3 in 2013), Evan Almighty is infamously known as one of the biggest box office bombs in cinematic history. With a budget of $175 million (said to be much higher according to some sources), one would hope some actual effort was put into the movie. The answer is a resounding no.

Taking place years after Bruce Almighty, Evan Baxter (Carell) has gone from gibberish speaking Buffalonian news anchor to Virginia congressman. The sequel promised a “comedic” reinvention of the story of Noah. What audiences received were shoehorned religious messages, animal poop jokes and an overabundance of painfully unfunny physical comedy. It’s like the scriptwriters struggled to even come up with humorous scenarios for Carell’s bumbling character. Carell hitting his thumb with a hammer is hilarious, so it must be even funnier when he does it a dozen more times, right? Thankfully, Carell moved on to better things, but Evan Almighty will be hard to forget even after his incredible performances in films like Little Miss Sunshine and Foxcatcher.

1. Son of the Mask

son-of-the-mask-2005-
“Might I interest you in some unamusing white rap, sir?”

Jamie Kennedy is the lead in the movie. If that doesn’t set off the warning sirens in your head than I don’t know what does. A sequel that is very loosely connected to The Mask, The Son of the Mask replaces the very talented Jim Carrey with the very obnoxious and not talented Kennedy. The “plot” revolves around a budding cartoonist played by Kennedy, who uncovers the same mask from the first film. Much like the original movie, the mask attaches itself to various people and turns them into a walking cartoon like gods with the powers of Bugs Bunny and Daffy Duck. There’s also a sub-plot involving Norse gods Loki (Alan Cummings) and Odin (Bob Hoskins) who want the mask for their own nefarious gains.

It also features one of the most terrifying CGI babies to ever exist on film. Seriously, seeing that horrific little demon spawn twist its little rubbery head around while crawling around on the ceiling is really unsettling.  Every joke falls flat and the sight gags hurt to watch. Universally panned by critics and audiences, The Son of the Mask ended any chance of a series of films (thank God). However, it did deal the deathblow to Kennedy’s career. So, there’s one good thing that came from this abomination.

Shows

Subscribe to One of Us Shop One of Us

An Interview with Cinema Magician: Lisa Cotterill

Empty Space

For this week’s blog on Shades of Cinema, I am bowing my brushes to the fabulous and absolutely gorgeous Lisa Cotterill, an accomplished make-up artist and make up instructor from Down Under!

Years doing make-up: 20 years

Favorite Make Up Color: Lividity by Premiere Products Inc. It’s the color of decomposition for corpses.

Favorite Brush: My flicking brush. It literally costs $2 and it’s my favorite. In the United States, they’re called “chip brushes.”

image008

What made you choose make up as a career?

That’s an interesting question. When I was in high school I wanted to get into psychology , but at the time my grades weren’t quite good enough and I had already been doing make up for friends. I think it was my cousin who said, “Why don’t you take professional make up course and see where it takes you?” So I ended up doing the course and pretty much got into make up for ten years, took a break in forensic science, then came back to make up.

So you were in forensic science?

Yes, for about four years, but I continued to do make up during school and doing forensics.

What school did you go to for make up?

I went to Make Up Glamour Technicians in Bondi Junction, Sydney in 1995.

image002

Are you strictly a film make-up artist?

Every now and again I’ll do a wedding, but most of my work is usually commercials and film. A majority of my special effects work is in film and in special events as well. I worked on a couple of my high profile clients recently who were going to celebrity Halloween parties and I do them as a private gig. I love the special effects and I teach special effects as well.

What do you prefer?

Definitely special effects over straight make up. Yeah, I’ve kind of been doing zombies now for the last four years so ask me to do a werewolf or aliens, anything other than a zombie for a little while! Take me away from the zombie genre for a little while!(giggle)

Your recent work with zombie make up is specifically referring to your work in Wyrmwood. How did you come to work with that particular project?

I was teaching in a school and “the boys,” Tristan and Kia Roach-Turner approached the school hoping that the students could work on the film. When I had a look at the script, I felt that it was a little more complicated than what we teach here. So, I thought, okay, I can always head up the department, teach them a couple of things, and then I would leave the project and the students can continue with the project. Unfortunately, the students found it to be too much work and ended up letting it drop by the wayside. I continued with it. I just thought it was lots of fun and allowed me to hone my skilled in special effects. We worked on the film for 4 years. It’s finally finished and will be getting some screen time soon.

image007

How fast can you create a zombie?

I have been known to whip out a zombie in half an hour, but I like to get 1-1 ½ hours in for a zombie.

Do you ask your subjects to prep their skin before working on them?

I don’t have my subjects do any prep, especially if I’m doing zombies. The worse their skin looks the better for me. Obviously, it’s a little harder for me if I have these beautiful models, it’s a lot of work. The prep that I do is that I make sure the skin is toned and there’s no oil on the skin. Then I put down a product called Derma Shield to protect them from any harsh products I may be putting on the skin.

When you do special effects, do you make your own prosthetics?

Yes. I work from home and I have a spare room set up in my apartment. I have it all set up as a lab. I mold, sculpt, and color all of my prosthetics. I put myself to do that using books and Vimeo videos. I’ve taught myself.

How do you learn new techniques?

You never know where you’re going to learn something. I did start the Dick Smith Correspondence course a few years back. And I kind of puttered it out and never finishedit. But there is a lot of information to be learned from old school techniques.

image004

Has the emergence of high definition changed your technique?

Oh, absolutely! It changes your products, it changes your application techniques, and it changes the way you view things as well. Back in the old days, when I was doing television in here Australia, you’d look in the mirror as you were working to see how it would look on film, because, it was a diffused image. It would be quite pixelated. Whereas these days, what you look at while you’re working is what the camera sees. There’s disparity between something that’s very unblended and something that’s slightly unblended.

What’s your most difficult day on the job?

I know the most challenging day on the job. We were shooting in an area of Sydney in the Blue Mountains on the property of a lovely couple who was helping us out. We had 25 fully “prostheticked” zombies. So contact lenses, facial prosthetics, lots of blood. I had a team of 10 make-up artists helping out on that day. It was like a production line. We were justgetting zombies made up, getting them sorted, chucking contact lenses, and covered in mud and blood. It was just a messy production line. We ended up with 35 zombies, 25 that were fully “prostheticked” and 10 that were just mostly cream, highlight/shade, contact lenses, and blood. That was a very big day, we started at 5AM.

What are your goals in your career?

I can only see my career going from strength to strength at this stage. I have considered coming to the United States and refining my techniques and learning from a couple of experts. This is the kind of industry where you can’t rest on your laurels. You have to keep updating and learning new techniques because there’s always something new happening. I’d love to do something like Hannibal or Walking Dead, and those kinds of TV series. That would be an ideal place for me. Even though it’s a quick turnover, I work quite well under pressure.

image003

What advice would you give a new make-up artist in the industry?

Definitely get your skills honed, practice and paint as much as you possibly can. Look into assisting established make-up artists so that you can work with them and find out, not just the skills of make-up, but how to work behind the scenes. How to conduct yourself on set, who to talk to, when not to talk, learning the nuances of the industry. Especially in film and television, it’s one of those industries where people are expecting high quality work. It’s not what it used to be, there’s a lot more competition and you really need to make sure you’re at the top of your game.

At the end of the day, if you have an artistic temperament, you just need to get out there and express yourself. Try everything, read books, read blogs, watch videos.  Just see what’s out there and you’ll find a place that you belong in. Make up is such a vast industry besides even film and television, there’s commercial, there’s fashion, and beauty make up. There so much out there. I think there’s a pocket for every make-up artist. You find where you fit in and what works for you.

Shows

Subscribe to One of Us Shop One of Us

Nostalgia Destroyers Episode 6: Guess The Game!

Empty Space

*****RANDOM WIN A THING WEEK!!!!!*****

GUESS WHAT WE PLAY NEXT WEEK AND WIN A THING!

That’s right folks if you can guess what game we play next week from this teaser you can WIN A THING!

The thing you get to win is a game from the Sega Megadrive/Genesis Collection on Steam!

It’s better than a kick to your privates. Something that if you had to pay for would be more expensive than this prize. Especially after signing all the wavers.

Click through to YouTube, comment there with your guess, and you could WIN A THING!

 

Empty SpaceShows

Subscribe to One of Us Shop One of Us

Inside The Locker: Turkey Shoot

Hope you brought your appetites, sports nerds, because this week’s episode of Inside the Locker is going to stuff your ear-face with awesome!


First up, we discuss some headlines that slipped past us last week, including our incredibly probable theory on what happened to the stolen Rich Eisen production truck. In honor of Thanksgiving, we also spend a few minutes dishing on our favorite cinematic turkeys; movies we recognize are terrible, but that we love anyway.


Top that off with a sinfully nerdy crème fraîche of awards and a visit from our Corner Man, and you’ll be loosening your belts by the time the episode is done.

 


Show Breakdown…


Scores & Stories (7:47)

Truck

Including, but not limited to, our Clue-like breakdown of the production truck heist, why you shouldn’t pick fights with bipolar NFL players on Twitter, why Jose Conseco will be god of his own religion in 30 years, and how one Michigan basketball player is modeling himself after Ernest Hemingway.

 


Shooting Some Turkeys (54:48)

MSDTUSH EC001

There are “bad” movies that are far better than their accepted reputations, and then there are the movies we’ll be blissfully chatting about today. On what truly awful movies do the locker denizens like to gorge themselves from time to time? What are your guiltiest of guilty pleasure movies?

 


Corner Man (1:28:24)

UFC
Vince returns with a trio of bouts that pack as many surprises as they do haymakers.

 


Awards (1:43:24)

Watt TD Catch
A full-on omelet bar, Elliott pwns everyone, and one man manages to win both Frittata and Cyborg honors simultaneously!

 

 

Follow us on Twitter, if you’re the only one of your friends not following us, you’ll look as awkward as this guy…

Costanzo

The Show Account–@ITLCast
Brian–@BriguySalisbury
J.C.–@jcdeleon1
Elliott–@ITLElliott
Adam–@the_beef
Vince-@DichotomusPrime

Check out Vince’s other site, The Rogues’ Gallery (www.roguescast.com), for Let’s Plays, written reviews, podcasts and more!

 

ALERT: WE WILL BE DOING A LIVE COMMENTARY FOR MONDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL THIS COMING MONDAY (11/24). MARK YOUR CALENDARS AND JOIN US!

Shows

Subscribe to One of Us Shop One of Us

Digital Noise Episode 69: I Think We’re STILL Recording

Riddle me this, DN Fans: What has three heads but only two talk at a time and loves Batman? It’s Digital Noise, of course, and this week your resident two heads are Richard and Chris who have their work cut out for them. With the Xmas season nearing, some weeks for our show are just LOADED with titles and this week…whew. So we apologize for our EPICALLY LONG episode, but damn, whattayagonnado?

They say it’s not length, but how to use it, and we do indeed use our 2+ hours well, talking about everything from Adam West era Batman to Jimmy Cameron at the bottom of the world. From gore-soaked Italian Demons to bullshit-soaked History Channel shows; from the story of Ali you wanted to see to the story of the biggest asshole of all the vampires. We’ve got it all this week!

And not just reviews: to make up for sticking with us, we’ve got TWO giveaway titles for ya this week. You can’t beat that with a batarang.

Empty Space

Please do use our Amazon links for all your online purchasing! We thank you!

Demons Bluray Review   Demons 2 Bluray Review   SOB DVD Review

Empty Space

Damned Bluray Review   Gingerclown DVD Review   Doll Bluray Review

Empty Space

House at the End of Time DVD Review   Tammy Bluray Review   Mood Indigo Bluray Review

Empty Space

Happy Christmas DVD Review   Jersey Boys Bluray Review   Deepsea Challenge 3D Bluray Review

Empty Space

I Am Santa Claus DVD Review   Patema Inverted Bluray Review   Welcome to the Space Show Bluray Review

Empty Space

Nocturna Bluray Review   Star Wars Clone Wars Lost Missions Bluray Review   Getting On Season 1 Bluray Review

Empty Space

Batman TV Series Bluray Review
117:19

Empty Space

Iceman Bluray Review   I Am Ali DVD Review

Empty Space

HOW TO WIN THE Iceman GIVEAWAY:

1) Follow @oneofusnet on Twitter

2) Tweet at us with the answer to this hypothetical: If you could freeze any historical figure frozen and then thawed in modern society, who would it be? (Important: Can’t be a historical figure featured in Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure)

3) Add #IceManGiveaway

4) We’ll select our favorite answer and contact that winner via Twitter (open to U.S. residents only).

 

 

HOW TO WIN THE  I Am Ali GIVEAWAY:

1) Follow @oneofusnet on Twitter

2) Tweet at us with the answer to this hypothetical: With whom would you most like to see Ali engaged in a rap battle?

3) Add #AliGiveaway

4) We’ll select our favorite answer and contact that winner via Twitter (open to U.S. residents only).

 

Shows

Subscribe to One of Us Shop One of Us

Highly Suspect Reviews: ‘The Hunger Games: Mockingjay Part 1’

The most successful YA-based film franchise (since that last successful YA-based film franchise of which we do not speak) returns with this grand finale(ish)!

Katniss Everdeen (Jennifer Lawrence) has gone from The Girl on Fire, the darling of The Hunger Games, to the living symbol of revolution! At least, the movie says it wants a revolution but well, you know, Katniss also has this whole boyfriend/love triangle thing to sort out that’s super complicated and OMG!

Unusual Suspects, and previous district champions Brian, Chris, and J.C. gather in their underground bunker to breakdown this highly anticipated flick. Will the film suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous…outrage, or will Mockingjay avoid all mockery whatsoever? Give a listen to this Highly Suspect Review and find out; odds are in your favor that you’ll at least come away with a chuckle or two.

 

Shows

Subscribe to One of Us Shop One of Us

World of UScast: British Bodcast Episode XIII: Thought Bubble Special

Duke and Kia are on a winter break! Luckily for One Of Us, they love podcasting so much, they decided to do it from the confines of their warm woodland lodge. Duke and Kia wax lyrical about the amazing Thought Bubble Comic Festival which resulted in them building a plethora of books, prints and awesome geeky stuff.

Duke then regales Kia with tales of his MRI scan and she scolds Duke for Googling his symptoms! Don’t forget to visit us on Facebook and find us on all social media platforms!

 

Shows Empty Space

SALT: Episode Nine-The Gray

Jean-Pierre Desperois. Born a slave in Haiti in a voodoo ritual with the power to travel through space and time. Now lives in Tunis. Smuggles salt. On payroll: crooked cops and hard-to-manage employees. When local gendarme Michel du Prix tells him about some corpses found in the desert, Jean-Pierre thinks nothing of it. But when the bodies start piling up, Jean-Pierre is implicated. Armed with nothing but his “baka” and his “ku-bha-sa”, Jean-Pierre tries to get to the bottom of the situation. But he’s in for more than he bargained.

Season One is 20 half-hour episodes released bi-weekly.

SALT is a spin-off of The Intergalactic Nemesis, an adventure set in the 1930s and taking the form of comic-books and graphic novels, audio drama, a web series, and a live theatrical production that’s touring the world. For access to all of this, check out www.theintergalacticnemesis.com.

Written and voiced by Jason Neulander. Additional voices by Buzz Moran, Danu Uribe, and Julie Linnard. Sound effects, audio engineering, and production by Buzz Moran. Original score by Adrian Quesada.

EPISODE NINE: THE GRAY

In which Jean-Pierre is led into a dense gray fog by Isabelle, hears strange noises, enters a small hut, and speaks at length with Makandal.

Did you miss Episode Eight? You can catch it right here.

Shows Empty Space

Animated Anarchy: Toy Story 4 and Pixar’s Decline

Hello everybody and welcome back to Animated Anarchy, where Animation Domination doesn’t just apply to Fox’s now abandoned Sunday Broadcasting block.

We all love Pixar. Even people who say they hate the studio will admit to liking one of their masterpieces like The Incredibles or Ratatouille. Last decade was the studio’s golden era beating out competitors of Disney and Dreamworks nearly every single year. But as the later studios have been climbing back into our hearts with their own franchises, the once ever-creative Pixar has fallen into a slump. And there is no better way to twist the public’s trust by trying to wring out some dollars from what many people consider to be the greatest film trilogy ever.

 

The only two entities who think improving on perfect trilogies are Disney and Peter Jackson
And the gang was just two days from retirement! The only people who approve of this are Disney and Peter Jackson.

 

The reaction to Toy Story 4’s announcement wasn’t: “Oh, I can’t wait to see Woody and Buzz in the others get in more adventures!” It was more akin to: “Why the hell is Pixar doing this?! You had the perfect ending, you don’t need to ruin the franchise!”

John Lasseter, Pixar’s Chief Creative Officer, has been quoted saying that: “We only make sequels when we have a story that’s as good as or better than the original.” And for Toy Story 2 and Toy Story 3, you can directly see how that mantra is true. Both movies were a natural evolution from the source, changing the themes of toy ownership from playing with toys, to collecting, to outgrowing them. I’d even say that Toy Story 3 is the best out of all of them for completing the story in such an emotional, incredible way. At the same time, no one counts out the quality of originals which will still stand as classics for all ages. This decision to make an additional movie reeks of executive meddling and it makes the recent Toy Story shorts come off as ways to test the waters than heartfelt spin-offs.

Pixar has stated that Toy Story 4 is going to center around a “female-empowering love story” with a screenplay tackled by comedian Rashida Jones. There’s potential to the idea of focusing on a love story with Jessie the Cowgirl and Buzz Lightyear, but I don’t see it as a full movie. Not to mention the other potential love interest, Bo Peep, was completely cut from the 3rd movie. The idea of capitalizing on this fulfilling and wonderfully crafted story is pure arrogance.

It reminds me of how J.J. Abrams wanted his rebooted Star Trek sequel to be a remake of Wrath of Khan. Sure, you can retread any story you want…but do you actually think you can do a better job than what many geeks consider to be one of the greatest sci-fi movies of all time?

 

There’s a reason why Abrams didn’t admit it was Khan until the movie actually came out…

 

Critics and similar geeks have been curious about Pixar’s quality since the company’s acquisition by Disney in 2006, but it’s never had to be scrutinized until this decade. Disney has also pressed Pixar to create the sequel Finding Dory for a 2016 release, which did not have the fervor of Toy Story 4’s announcement, but still led to some questioning. At this point, it’s hard to tell what Pixar values more between quality or profit as their last three films have shown.

Look at all those toys!
Look at all those toys!

Cars 2 is the black mark of Pixar’s spotless track record. The first film was a genuine hit with kids, even though it was treading a familiar story line. Cars 2 from the beginning of production to the film’s release received nothing more than deserved criticism. They decided to completely focus around the obnoxious Mater (voiced by Larry-That-Cable-Guy-Whose-Still-Around) but also hashed up a familiar tale about spies and espionage that is surprisingly common in children’s animation. It isn’t funny, it doesn’t do anything clever, and it has story-beats you can see from miles away. Even though the franchise is Lasseter’s baby, this film is the billboard “shameless sequel.”

“Brave” aka “How to Manipulate and Poison Your Village!”

 

Brave wasn’t a very good follow-up to people’s wavering faith in the studio. Although it has many fans for the breathtaking animation and concentrating on a mother-daughter relationship, I genuinely did not enjoy the movie. The story was shockingly cliché and lacked Pixar’s standard for having an immersive world or realistic characters. Even if you are a fan of the movie, the production issues were quite noticeable as the themes about tradition and bonding get immediately solved when the plot shifts. Little girls might consider Merida a positive role model, but she is easily one of the weakest Disney Princesses for her motives and attitude.

Imagine the controversy if Sully seduced a woman in a Darth Vader suit...
Imagine the controversy if Sully seduced a woman in a Darth Vader suit…

Monsters University is probably the most successful recent project made by Pixar so far. Even though I personally hated the ending that many people respect the movie for, it did show you can make an entertaining story out of prequel. However, the film doesn’t really hold up to Lasseter’s statement about making a sequel because a good, original idea came to the studio. If you boil it down, the movie is mostly a knockoff of Animal House or Revenge of the Nerds.

It’s an unnecessary prequel, but many still found it to be a pleasant experience and it has one genuinely fantastic scene in the climax with the Pixar magic we all know and love. Still, no one puts Monsters University with any of the studio’s classics or critical heavyweights like Up or WALL-E. I don’t believe it even holds a candle to the original.

We’re at a point where Pixar’s most staunch defenders are starting to question the studio’s once insurmountable quality. Toy Story 4‘s announcement has simply caused more skepticism. The biggest fear is that this new sequel will be another Cars 2, and it’ll confirm all of our worries of what the company has become. Thankfully, not all hope is lost.

Gooddino
Here’s the only thing we got so far, kids!

We do have two Pixar movies on the horizon that are brand spanking-new properties. One of which is The Good Dinosaur, a film that has been in production since 2009. Sadly it has already changed directors from Bob Peterson (The director of Up) to Peter Sohn (The director of the short “Partly Cloudy”). Although the film has an expected release date for next year’s Thanksgiving, there hasn’t been any marketing or advertising for the film. That’s pretty worrisome considering the team that’s making the movie.

The other film as many of already know is Inside Out, scheduled for June 19th, 2015. In the middle of all these mediocre quality, Inside Out is a plant that sprouted from a boot full of dirt. It has impeccable casting and brings anthropomorphism to emotions in a cute, unique way. You can take this concept in a number of great directions. Plus, the trailer really shows the amount of potential there.

 

That’s the key word there: potential. I thought Brave had a lot of potential, but it was absolutely wasted. I can see where this is going, but I’m trying to wrap my mind around making emotions like Disgust and Fear into really likeable characters. There are a lot of different dimensions you can go in with the varied emotions, but I fear that Pixar might go too broadly in order to not offend anyone or break away from the premise. After all, this video is only a teaser and spent most of the time being a retrospective of the studio.

What’s once made me immediately excited for every animated film has now left me unsure with where Pixar is going. Toy Story 4 could be phenomenal if I set my expectations low. In fact, many people want to connect this fourth movie to the Andy’s Mom theory from Toy Story 2. Frankly, it’s bizarre they didn’t tap The Incredibles for sequel, as the film ends openly and it’s the most commonly demanded sequel by fans. Inside Out is Pixar’s best chance to earn back the good graces they have lost. A lot can be done within three years, but as geeks, we must prepare ourselves for the worst.

 

Dreamworks had to make two new franchises to make up for this AND it got a 4th Movie!
Dreamworks had to make two new franchises to make up for this AND it got a 4th Movie!

 

Thanks again for reading Animated Anarchy. Although this article is all about Pixar films, you may see a full write-up of any one of these movies coming soon or see their names appear in another blog. Tell me your thoughts on Pixar’s current status or upcoming projects!

Shows

Somebody Likes It Ep 18 – Meatloaf: “Bat Out of Hell”

Ch-ch-ch-changes! Change is blowing in the wind over here at Somebody Likes It town. Kevin is gonna be ducking out for a few weeks while he and his wife care for their new-born child. Don’t fret though, he’ll be back before you know it. In the meantime, Ryan and I are happy to report that we’ll be joined by Mark Couvillion. In fact Mark starts joining us in the Episode. IN FACT the Album selection for this week has been provided by Mark, and if it’s any indication of what we can expect out of him in the future, then it’s gonna be an interesting tenure. Cause this week we were all subjected to the god-awful piece of shit that is Meatloaf’s “Bat Out of Hell”. The less I say the better ’cause after this week, I am going to try and forget I ever even heard of that record. Gonna try really really really really hard to forget. It’s that bad.

It doesn’t get any easier during our segment A Few Minutes With, cause I picked Billy Ocean’s “Get Outta My Dreams, Get Outta My Car” to discuss. I probably would have picked something better had I known what he had up his sleeve. All in all we survived so I guess all is well with the world. And now you get to listen to the fruits of our labor!

SLI_Album_MeatLoaf

Next week: We’re back with Kevin’s last show for a while, and fittingly, he goes out on an record of his choosing: “Atlas” by Real Esate…

–Shane

Shows Empty Space