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ANACONDA MOVIE REVIEW
If you’ve ever seen the 1997 horror film Anaconda starring Jennifer Lopez, Ice Cube, Jon Voight, Owen Wilson, and Eric Stoltz, you know that it’s not exactly a masterpiece of the genre. And yet, it stubbornly exudes a weird cultural fascination that only comes with movies that are very bad yet oddly entertaining nonetheless. Now flash to today with this new Anaconda. It’s not a remake. It’s not a reboot. It’s not even really a horror film. It’s Jack Black, Paul Rudd, Thandiwe Newton, and Steve Zahn in a world (still too stupid to be ours, which is saying something) where they revere the original film Anaconda and have decided to film a remake in the Amazon jungle together. These childhood friends who once dreamed of becoming genre filmmakers now face up against more challenges than L.A. could have thrown at them with gold pirates, IP rights issues, an actual dinosaur sized anaconda, and most failingly, attempting to be funny. Scary was out the window from the get-go. Chris, Wright, Mike the Editor, and Kim get together to discuss the film that you’ll probably forget even exists by this time next year.
DIRECTED BY: Tom Gormican
STARRING: Paul Rudd, Jack Black, Steve Zahn, Thandiwe Newton, Daniela Melchior, Selton Mello, Ione Skye, Ben Lawson, Rui Ricardo Diaz, John Billingsley
YOUR REVIEWERS
Christopher Lawrence Cox (Founder, Da Boss, Digital Noise, Highly Suspect Reviews, Screener Squad, Deliberations of Doom)
Born in the wilds of northern Virginia, Chris managed to put all of his survival skills to use and barely escaped with his life to Austin Texas in 1992 where ever since he’s dabbled in everything from plumber’s assistant to sandwich maker, from band to bar and theater management. An opportunity to see theatrical release films for free by becoming a critic on a local public access show called “The Reel Deal” turned into a full-time job when Chris and his friends decided to take it to the internet. They built the site Spill.com, adding multiple podcasts and animated features, to no small amount of success. During this time, a fortuitous friendship sprung up between Chris and young Brian Salisbury, who was also a local film critic, and they merged their forces of will, and their laundry list of ideas for shows, to eventually build this community of critics. While Brian eventually followed his heart to a new family, Chris continues on with a cast of colorful folks from all over the country (and a few others).
Wright Sulek (The Other Boss, Trash in the Can, Digital Noise, Highly Suspect Reviews, One Man’s Trash, Screener Squad)
Wright hails from the northern suburbs of Dallas, Texas. His passion for filmmaking brought him to Austin to study and make movies. Since then he’s had his hand in acting, writing, and directing his own short films with numerous like-minded film geeks he’s met along his journey. His newest interest has brought him into the podcasting world. He co-hosted a few different movie related podcasts such as ‘And Now This’ and ‘The Match Cut’. He currently co-hosts with longtime friend, Eric Samaniego, where they talk shop about the grimiest, trashiest, lost gems of movies on their show, ‘Trash in the Can’. Wright also guests and hosts reviews on Screener Squad and Highly Suspect Reviews as well as co-hosts Digital Noise with Chris Cox. As of 2024, Wright has now been inducted into the Austin Film Critics Association as well as co-owns the One of Us network with Chris Cox.
Kimberly Brown (Highly Suspect Reviews)
Kimberly wants to live in a world filled with blue telephone boxes, speedsters, and ice dragons but through an ironic twist of fate, she’s stuck in this reality where these wondrous things only exist on page or film. Kim’s perpetual desire to consume sci-fi and fantasy media as a teen led her to the study of illustration/design at university to better understand its creation. Currently an Austin transplant, when she’s not wearing her critic hat you can find her pretending to like hiking, fielding questions about her hair or maybe even enjoying a local brew at the nearest dive bar.
Mike J. McAllister (Screener Squad, Staff Writer, Head Video Editor)
Mike J. McAllister is an award-winning creative jack of all trades, and is pretty competent with most of them. He is a writer, director, animator, video editor, and motion graphics artist. He has tried his hand at nearly every form of artistic expression at least once. He was born and raised in Western Pennsylvania where he fell in love with film, writing and special effects at an early age. His obsession with film would lead him to being locally known as a “human IMDb” and being on a first-name basis with every video store clerk in town. He would study film in Pittsburgh before taking his talents to Austin. Not letting something like Tourettes get in his way, he has produced a handful of animated short films that have won awards from film festivals all over the globe. He has also written several yet-to-be-produced screenplays and TV pilots, with some of them being recognized in screenwriting competitions. He has even created motion graphics and animations for several clients, from movie theaters to Twitch streamers. When not creating or watching films, he enjoys MST3K, classic video games and buying vinyl records. He loves dogs, dropping obscure pop culture trivia and watching travel videos. He currently resides in Austin Texas and can be followed on the Instamagrams at @ohheyitsmikejm. His body of work can be found at his homepage or you can take a gander at his somewhat-impressive IMDb listing here.
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