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FINAL DESTINATION: BLOODLINES REVIEW
2025 is surprisingly turning out to be a big year for horror, and while returns to franchises that haven’t had a new entry in well over a decade certainly hasn’t consistently had gold results, we always hold out hope that a formerly great series can regain its glory once more. We didn’t expect one to surpass that glory. Final Destination: Bloodlines (why do so many late horror series entries have ‘bloodlines’ in the title?) is the sixth in this series. If you don’t know, there’s no masked killer, no vengeful spirit. All the entries in the series follow people who SHOULD have died according to a completely unanthpomorphasized Death, really just the ‘universe’s plan’, but due to one person having a premonition of a huge disaster that takes them all out in usually over-the-top grisly fashions, they all cheat Death. But cheating Death is not that easy. One at a time, in the order they WOULD have died, Death takes them, usually in a rube goldbergian way, so that nowhere and nothing is safe. This new tale starts with a woman waking up from a premonition of a horrific tragedy, only it’s not her it’s happening to. Turns out, it was her grandmother, who she’s never met and the family doesn’t talk about, who originally had this vision and kept hundreds of people from dying. After getting clued into what Death was up to by multiple deaths of survivors, she managed to dodge her own death for a long time. But it also made anyone who knew her want nothing to do with her, and it’s hard to blame them as it all sounds like crazy town. Unfortunately for this family though, once she passes on, Death gets back to doing what he does in the order intended. The granddaughter is the only one who MAYBE can figure out how to cheat Death one more time. Chris, Wright, Nathan, and Ben went in with high hopes to this new entry and were genuinely surprised that they were not disappointed.
DIRECTED BY: Zach Lipovsky and Adam Stein
STARRING: Kaitlyn Santa Juana, Teo Briones, Richard Harmon, Owen Patrick Joyner, Rya Kihlstedt, Anna Lore, Gabrielle Rose, Brec Bassinger, Tony Todd, Jayden Oniah, Tinpo Lee, April Telek, Alex Zahara, Max Lloyd Jones, Brenna Llewellyn, Yvette Ferguson, Mark Brandon
YOUR REVIEWERS
Christopher Lawrence Cox (Founder, Da Boss, Digital Noise, Highly Suspect Reviews, Screener Squad, Deliberations of Doom)
Born in the wilds of northern Virginia, Chris managed to put all of his survival skills to use and barely escaped with his life to Austin Texas in 1992 where ever since he’s dabbled in everything from plumber’s assistant to sandwich maker, from band to bar and theater management. An opportunity to see theatrical release films for free by becoming a critic on a local public access show called “The Reel Deal” turned into a full-time job when Chris and his friends decided to take it to the internet. They built the site Spill.com, adding multiple podcasts and animated features, to no small amount of success. During this time, a fortuitous friendship sprung up between Chris and young Brian Salisbury, who was also a local film critic, and they merged their forces of will, and their laundry list of ideas for shows, to eventually build this community of critics. While Brian eventually followed his heart to a new family, Chris continues on with a cast of colorful folks from all over the country (and a few others).
Wright Sulek (The Other Boss, Trash in the Can, Digital Noise, Highly Suspect Reviews, Screener Squad)
Wright hails from the northern suburbs of Dallas, Texas. His passion for filmmaking brought him to Austin to study and make movies. Since then he’s had his hand in acting, writing, and directing his own short films with numerous like-minded film geeks he’s met along his journey. His newest interest has brought him into the podcasting world. He co-hosted a few different movie related podcasts such as ‘And Now This’ and ‘The Match Cut’. He currently co-hosts with longtime friend, Eric Samaniego, where they talk shop about the grimiest, trashiest, lost gems of movies on their show, ‘Trash in the Can’. Wright also guests and hosts reviews on Screener Squad and Highly Suspect Reviews as well as co-hosts Digital Noise with Chris Cox. As of 2024, Wright has now been inducted into the Austin Film Critics Association as well as co-owns the One of Us network with Chris Cox.
Nathan Flynn (Screener Squad, Highly Suspect Reviews)
Nathan Flynn is the resident goofball of One of Us. Net, often found overly caffeinated, slightly stoned, and ready to unleash the hottest takes imaginable. As the resident Letterboxd Lunatic, his movie opinions are as bold as his love for Top Gun: Maverick — a film he considers less of a movie and more of a religion. When he’s not passionately defending his latest cinematic obsession, Nathan manages a comedy club in downtown Austin, where he’s somehow avoided being heckled… so far. Around here, he’s usually the punching bag, but hey, someone’s gotta do it.
Ben Glasthal (Highly Suspect Review, Screener Squad, Breakfast Pub, Unstabletop Gamers, Video and Audio Editor)
Born in Boston, then ending up in Dallas, Texas in the early 2000s, Ben has always had a passion for film. He started in film school not long after where he launched MovieReelizations.com where he still writes reviews to this day. He’s since moved to Austin where he has been also hopping on podcasts and both editing and shooting videos for One of Us. A fan of films from almost all genres, and many that predate him more than makes sense, he is anything if not eclectic in what he’s watching at any point. For the rest of his free time, he can be found biking, drinking craft beer, being an amateur photographer, and playing video games by himself or on Twitch. He’s best found on Instagram or Twitter as @MovieReelBen.
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