Highly Suspect Reviews: The Light Between Oceans

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Michael Fassbender just got back from the Great War and honestly? He just doesn’t feel like talking to anybody at ALL. Which is why he took a position working as a lighthouse keeper out on this tiny island in the middle of nowhere. Sweet, sweet, exclusion. But here comes Alicia Vikander to f&%k it all up by flinging herself at him and making him fall in love…and then, no babies… WHERE’S THE DAMN BABIES? Oh, wait, there’s one in that boat that washed up after the storm. Well, honey, that baby probably belongs to someone..FINDERS KEEPERS, MFers. *this can’t possibly come back to bite us in the ass*

And thus is the story of The Light Between Oceans, sort of. Probably a lot more classy than I made it sound. Certainly significantly more long. Listen to Chris and Frank tell you about it.


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