Highly Suspect Reviews: Bridge of Spies | One of Us

Highly Suspect Reviews: Bridge of Spies

17 Submitted by on Thu, 15 October 2015, 10:59
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Tom Hanks the lead in a film directed by Steven Spielberg and written by the Coen Brothers…yeah, sounds like that would probably suck, right? NO OF COURSE IT’S NOT GOING TO SUCK YOU FOOLS. Which is why I was a bit baffled I couldn’t drum up more interest with our critic group in going to see it. This true story with Tom playing the guy who negotiated the release of a American spy for a Russian one during the Cold War is just as good as it’s pedigree suggests. Listen to Chris, Elliot and JC cast shame on the others for not showing up in their review.

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Born in the wilds of northern Virginia, in 1992 Chris managed to put all of his survival skills to use and barely escaped with his life to Austin Texas, where ever since he’s dabbled in everything from plumber’s assistant to sandwich maker, from band to bar management. An opportunity to see theatrical release films for free, by becoming a critic on a local public access show called “The Reel Deal”, turned into a full time job when Chris and his friends decided to take it to the internet. They built the site Spill.com, adding multiple podcasts and animated features, to no small amount of success. During this time, a fortuitous friendship sprung up between Chris and young Brian Salisbury, who was also a local film critic, and they merged their forces of will, and their laundry list of ideas for shows, to eventually build this paradise you see before you.
  • Andre Garcia

    Chris, you forgot to review Pan!!

    • Chris Cox

      Oh, I didn’t forget.

      • Andre Garcia

        What happened?

        • GodDamnRobots

          Chris has often expressed that peanut butter is a problem for him the way crack cocaine, or alcohol, is for the rest of us. Especially the pure, organic kind. You can’t expect him to go cold turkey. I think watching a movie involving Peter Pan would be a trigger for him, and he’s being very wise to avoid it. He’s in recovery. Leave him alone.

          • GodDamnRobots

            I mean it would be like asking C. Robert Cargill to review “Thank you for Smoking”

          • GodDamnRobots

            Or asking me to review anything involving Eva Green without having an orgasm that would kill me.

          • GodDamnRobots

            Or asking Brian Salisbury to review “Snake Plissken v.s. Mike Myers protecting all the dogs of the world”

          • GodDamnRobots

            Or asking Martin Thomas to review “Pork Rind Strip Club 3: Paisley Shirts Get In Free”

          • GodDamnRobots

            i’m drunk

          • Brian_Salisbury

            This entire self-thread…

        • Mr_Plainview

          Pan happened Andre Garcia, Pan happened.

          The devastation has been horrendous and there has been no word on how many have been affected by the tragedy. The therapy bills for those subjected to its torment are estimated to be in the hundreds of millions. Our hearts and prayers go out to those in the theaters that were ravaged by this event.

  • Mr_Plainview

    Tom Hanks is a national treasure. It’s required by law that all U.S. citizens must see at least one Tom Hanks movie a year or else they have their citizenship revoked and are deported. Which if you didn’t have dual citizenship with another country means you are cursed to spend the rest of your life in a foreign airport unable to enter the country because you don’t have a valid passport. Just like Tom Hanks in The Terminal. A fitting punishment for the treason of not watching a yearly Tom Hanks film.

  • You’re Not My Supervisor

    Chris, The Coen’s didn’t write the script they did revisions on it. I thought it was important to point that out.

  • Batj()y

    History…John Adams defended British solders of murder(Boston Massacre) and Thomas Jefferson sent the U.S. Navy to bomb forts in Tripoli of Libya because they were kidnapping U.S. Mercents at sea.

  • Batj()y

    Scario was awesome, go see it if you don’t want to deal with the crowds of this movie.

  • Whitewizard

    i cant speak in a matter of certainty but i think the reason many schools end up with incompetent history teachers is that they view the subject as 2nd class material and just end up shoving the gym teacher into the classroom.

    thankfully my history teacher was top 2 in terms of intelligence and passion among my various high school teachers. so i received a very strong appreciation for it. i ended up with a BA in history and i am seriously thinking about becoming a teacher next year.

    also fun history fact time: Eisenhower never heard a dial tone till he was 70 and out of office, and there was a slave revolt in sicily during the ancient roman senate days (not Spartacus) that was so successful and complete that they started printing their own currency to be used in their communities.

    • Chris Cox

      You were lucky to have such a motivated, enthusiastic teacher. I didn’t discover a love for history till much later.