Highly Suspect Reviews: ‘Annabelle’ | One of Us

Highly Suspect Reviews: ‘Annabelle’

18 Submitted by on Thu, 02 October 2014, 13:01
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“Hey, The Conjuring was a huge hit! How do we follow it up? Who doesn’t love a horror prequel?”

“Um, sir, our numbers say…no one.”

“Well how about if we do this…NONE of the original characters appear in the film. What do you say now, smart guy?”

“Sir, it seems to me that’s even worse. What even makes this connected to the first film?”

“The fuckin’ doll in the beginning, whatserface…anny or whatever. Make it about the doll. Goddamn Chucky was a license to print money. We’re gonna get in on that. Evil dolls, man.”

“Yes, erm….I gotta go update my Linked In profile…”

Brian and Chris cast a skeptical eye on this rather disconnected sorta prequel, sorta spin-off of The Conjuring. Much fun is had at its expense.

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Born in the wilds of northern Virginia, in 1992 Chris managed to put all of his survival skills to use and barely escaped with his life to Austin Texas, where ever since he’s dabbled in everything from plumber’s assistant to sandwich maker, from band to bar management. An opportunity to see theatrical release films for free, by becoming a critic on a local public access show called “The Reel Deal”, turned into a full time job when Chris and his friends decided to take it to the internet. They built the site Spill.com, adding multiple podcasts and animated features, to no small amount of success. During this time, a fortuitous friendship sprung up between Chris and young Brian Salisbury, who was also a local film critic, and they merged their forces of will, and their laundry list of ideas for shows, to eventually build this paradise you see before you.